Vital Relations: Couples and Colleagues
This title may prompt thoughts about life-work balance. And some, tiring of the same old debates on this subject, will say, “Get over it! There is no such thing.” Not to worry, we’ll be setting that quarrel aside. Rather, we’re going to consider some vital, normative life-work connections.
Boundaries
For many of us it seems best to keep work and life outside of work separated by a clear boundary. This boundary is defined in part by distinct personal priorities. We take both domains seriously and consider what we owe to others in both parts of life. The cross-cutting themes and connecting tissues that make common claims upon us are relational and moral, for what we owe consists of an ethic of care.
Viewed this way, we can find advantages to the separation and interconnection of life spheres. Stepping away from situations and then returning after some interval and change of scene can refresh our ways of seeing things. It’s called an incubation effect because in the transitional time and space between roles and places new perspectives and possibilities are born – particularly helpful in problem solving.
However, there is also a continuity of responsibilities of care. We are one and the same person who hears and relates to others, who finds ourself in quarrels that strain relationships. In both interpersonal arenas our ways of attending, responding, and communicating help to repair strained relations. And in both trust, empathy, and a willingness to bear the tension of working through difference is essential.
Integration
There is a fortunate convergence of mature forces that we experience when our exercise of work and nonwork roles and relationships are grounded in the ethic of care. It is all the easier to leave others feeling heard and respected, which relieves them of the felt necessity to raise their voice or marshal aggressive energies to be recognized and make their point.
In both domains of life there are times when we must persevere and “bite our tongue.” Emotional self-management skills grow all the faster. Skills of attending and noticing spikes in reactive emotion in self or others grow in ease and competence. And perhaps most important of all the gains, we become more integrated human beings. And that conveys authenticity to others.
Take a Moment to Reflect
I encourage you to consider this brief reflection on relationships. How are they working for you, at home, with significant others? And how are they working with colleagues at work? What do you struggle with at home and at work? What have you learned about working through difficult issues and repairing strains? Are you more or differently attentive to the ethic of care at work or at home?
Our lives can feel so rushed, at times so chaotic and without boundaries. And in a disordered life it’s harder to realize an ethic of care. Of course, we’ll never live this ethic perfectly. The key is to gain an awareness of growing strain and disorder, not to judge ourselves harshly for our imperfections. For then, we can use this awareness as a call to pause, breathe, knowing we can always begin again.
Exhausted from trying too hard?
Ceaseless striving is a sign that we've lost perspective. It's marked by growing fatigue. And regaining perspective frees us from this exhausting state. We acquire a considered view of life, our situation, and the surrounding world. No longer swallowed up in frantic activity, we recognize that we've lost our bearings.
In this light, perspective-taking merits the status of a vital practice in life. But to maximize its effects, it should be a mindful perspective-taking. That implies holding our experience in balanced awareness, neither pushing it away nor clutching it too closely. Either of those mind states remain too much in the grip our striving mind.
Having observed this, let's acknowledge that the idea is beautifully simple in concept, but often so much more difficult in practice. The mind of an achievement-oriented person is a particularly busy and distracting source of desires, impulses, and ruminations. So mindful perspective-taking will always only occur with deliberate intent and practice.
Exhaustion: A 2 X 4 for the Professional
As with many practical virtues, the achievement drive has a dark side. We can over-learn goal-directedness, forward thinking, and a never-give-up work ethic. They're adaptive and serve developmental purposes up to a point. So, they can become ingrained in our habits of thought, feeling, and action. And we must then learn to notice when this drive runs amok.
That's where exhaustion becomes our friend. It alerts us to an approaching inflection point. Even before it becomes exhaustion, growing levels of stress, strain, and fatigue register as warning signs if we pause to notice them. If we "heroically" minimize or deny them, we may just drive right over the cliff. It's the storied hubris of tragic endings - a lack of humility.
But you don't need to do it all yourself. In fact, others often notice the signs before you do. Your spouse, partner, co-workers witness the "decompensating" effects of stress, strain, and fatigue that result from a protracted period of ceaseless striving. So, we must learn to listen, to tap into their observations with curiosity and patience, formally and informally.
But no matter how smart and accomplished we are, there are times when it seems that all that will get our attention is the proverbial 2 X 4-in-the-head experience. A conspicuous failure or an embarrassing experience of overreacting - that's learning the hard way. It's not what I would wish for anyone, but it is survivable. And it's also avoidable.
From Afflictive to Skillful Emotion
Afflictive emotions are those that "have us." Skillful emotions are those that "we have." The former are intense enough to overwhelm our capacity for seeing things as they are and might be. They underlie and energize the drive run amok. And the way they are disarmed is not by avoiding, denying, or minimizing them, but by seeing and exploring them.
We do that by processing them and noticing that it is our relationship to them that is toxic and self-limiting. We are feeling breathless, embattled, afraid. So stop, breathe, lay down your arms. You will see that your enemy's posture, size, and proximity change too. You can unilaterally effect a moment of peace. Now, start afresh, reappraise the situation.
It may be possible to do this on your own, but if you're feeling "real" stuck, and if the history and habits are longer and run deeper, it may be helpful to do this in dialogue with a professional. Give yourself the care and attention you might usually reserve for those you most love and care about. Let others be there with you and for you.
If exhaustion brings you to this point, it truly is your friend.
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December 2023
- Dec 18, 2023 Are You Working Too Hard? Dec 18, 2023
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October 2023
- Oct 2, 2023 The Power of Empathic Notice Oct 2, 2023
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January 2023
- Jan 19, 2023 A Five-Step Pathway to Positive Attitude Jan 19, 2023
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November 2022
- Nov 4, 2022 Resentment and Ressentiment Nov 4, 2022
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July 2022
- Jul 19, 2022 Overcoming Resentment Jul 19, 2022
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February 2022
- Feb 28, 2022 What Does it Mean to Express Our Feelings? Feb 28, 2022
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October 2021
- Oct 18, 2021 Coping is More Than Acceptance Oct 18, 2021
- Oct 13, 2021 Loneliness Oct 13, 2021
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September 2021
- Sep 25, 2021 Opposites Attract … and They Fight Sep 25, 2021
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August 2021
- Aug 13, 2021 Coping With Negativity Aug 13, 2021
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May 2021
- May 23, 2021 Relationships and Emotional Truth May 23, 2021
- May 3, 2021 Meeting Others as Persons May 3, 2021
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April 2021
- Apr 23, 2021 Apologies Apr 23, 2021
- Apr 5, 2021 Change, Motivation, and Practical Wisdom Apr 5, 2021
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March 2021
- Mar 2, 2021 Learning to Lead Mar 2, 2021
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February 2021
- Feb 7, 2021 Whence Cometh Virtue? Feb 7, 2021
- Feb 6, 2021 Escaping Isolation Feb 6, 2021
- Feb 4, 2021 Executive Function Feb 4, 2021
- Feb 2, 2021 Moments of Meeting Make a Difference Feb 2, 2021
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January 2021
- Jan 28, 2021 Mood, Emotions, and How to Deal with Them Jan 28, 2021
- Jan 24, 2021 Leadership, Purpose, & Values Jan 24, 2021
- Jan 18, 2021 Leadership in a Post-Trump Era Jan 18, 2021
- Jan 11, 2021 Improving Relationships Jan 11, 2021
- Jan 5, 2021 3 Steps to Reach Your Goals in 2021 Jan 5, 2021
- Jan 3, 2021 Needs in Development: Therapy, Relationships, and Redemption Jan 3, 2021
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December 2020
- Dec 23, 2020 “Measure twice, cut once.” The Carpenter’s Motto. Dec 23, 2020
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November 2020
- Nov 19, 2020 Positive Purpose: Antidote for Chronic Interpersonal Conflict Nov 19, 2020
- Nov 15, 2020 A Couples Competency: Being Friends Nov 15, 2020
- Nov 8, 2020 Learning to Let Go Nov 8, 2020
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October 2020
- Oct 29, 2020 About Metaphysics and Mind: Why We Should Care Oct 29, 2020
- Oct 12, 2020 Peace and Conflict: Reciprocal Forces Oct 12, 2020
- Oct 6, 2020 Job Crafting as Gateway to Vocational Development Oct 6, 2020
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September 2020
- Sep 6, 2020 Awaiting Liberty: The American Caste System Sep 6, 2020
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August 2020
- Aug 24, 2020 Job "Crafting" - Little Changes Can Improve Fit Aug 24, 2020
- Aug 17, 2020 Human Beings: The Angry Species? Aug 17, 2020
- Aug 14, 2020 Irritability and Tension, What's it Telling You? Aug 14, 2020
- Aug 13, 2020 Ruminating too much? Schedule your worries! Aug 13, 2020
- Aug 10, 2020 Positioned to Lead - At All Levels Aug 10, 2020
- Aug 8, 2020 Identity as Integration Aug 8, 2020
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July 2020
- Jul 30, 2020 What is the Virtue of Work? Jul 30, 2020
- Jul 21, 2020 Parents: Making Self-Care a Priority Jul 21, 2020
- Jul 20, 2020 In the Market for a New Job? Jul 20, 2020
- Jul 18, 2020 Psychologically-Based Coaching Jul 18, 2020
- Jul 12, 2020 The Nobility of Vocation Jul 12, 2020
- Jul 9, 2020 We Shape Our World Jul 9, 2020
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June 2020
- Jun 28, 2020 Revealing Worries Helps Jun 28, 2020
- Jun 20, 2020 In the Heat of the Moment Jun 20, 2020
- Jun 5, 2020 Attitude Jun 5, 2020
- Jun 3, 2020 In Praise of Passivity Jun 3, 2020
- Jun 1, 2020 Focus on Career Jun 1, 2020
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May 2020
- May 30, 2020 Active Listening and Intimacy May 30, 2020
- May 27, 2020 Tolerance for Intense Emotions May 27, 2020
- May 21, 2020 Getting it Right and Getting it Done May 21, 2020
- May 19, 2020 Coping with COVID & Adaptive Change May 19, 2020
- May 9, 2020 What Are Data? May 9, 2020
- May 2, 2020 Concepts and Intuition: Two Ways of Knowing May 2, 2020
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April 2020
- Apr 25, 2020 Emotional Dysregulation in the Pandemic Apr 25, 2020
- Apr 22, 2020 Experience Arrives Unbidden Apr 22, 2020
- Apr 17, 2020 Evocative Stimuli for Growth and Change Apr 17, 2020
- Apr 15, 2020 Morning Hours Apr 15, 2020
- Apr 14, 2020 Innovation versus Opportunism Apr 14, 2020
- Apr 10, 2020 Verstehen, Empathy, and Motivation Apr 10, 2020
- Apr 8, 2020 Are You Getting Grumpy? Apr 8, 2020
- Apr 5, 2020 5 Reasons to Talk to a Therapist During the Pandemic Apr 5, 2020
- Apr 1, 2020 The Other Sympathetic Response System Apr 1, 2020
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March 2020
- Mar 26, 2020 Virtual Meetings on Big Ideas Mar 26, 2020
- Mar 18, 2020 Life, Self, and Action - even during COVID 19 Mar 18, 2020
- Mar 17, 2020 Growth Occurs in Spurts: Are You Ready? Mar 17, 2020
- Mar 12, 2020 Making Video Connections Work Mar 12, 2020
- Mar 10, 2020 Are You Neurotic? Mar 10, 2020
- Mar 9, 2020 Do You Use Your Smile? Mar 9, 2020
- Mar 7, 2020 The Freed Group and Team Mar 7, 2020
- Mar 5, 2020 Being There Mar 5, 2020
- Mar 4, 2020 What's Next? (career, relationships, self-discovery) Mar 4, 2020
- Mar 2, 2020 A New Angle on the “Who Am I?” Question Mar 2, 2020
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February 2020
- Feb 28, 2020 Everyone Wants to Manage, Right? Feb 28, 2020
- Feb 25, 2020 Discussion & Dialogue: Their Distinct Purposes Feb 25, 2020
- Feb 19, 2020 Too Soon Old Feb 19, 2020
- Feb 14, 2020 Freedom: Organism as Person Feb 14, 2020
- Feb 5, 2020 Interviewing: Candidate as Collaborator Feb 5, 2020
- Feb 2, 2020 Coping With Persistent Anxiety Feb 2, 2020
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January 2020
- Jan 28, 2020 Depression or Despair? Jan 28, 2020
- Jan 20, 2020 Does One's Personality Change? Jan 20, 2020
- Jan 13, 2020 Criticism, Positive or Negative? Jan 13, 2020
- Jan 12, 2020 Anger Jan 12, 2020
- Jan 6, 2020 Making Couple’s Therapy Work Jan 6, 2020
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December 2019
- Dec 31, 2019 A New Existentialism Dec 31, 2019
- Dec 26, 2019 Emotional Meaning ≠ Emotional Intelligence Dec 26, 2019
- Dec 18, 2019 The Importance of Emotional Meaning Dec 18, 2019
- Dec 16, 2019 Motivation as Moving Cause Dec 16, 2019
- Dec 13, 2019 Effective Interpersonal Presence: How We Get There Dec 13, 2019
- Dec 11, 2019 When Loneliness is Fear Dec 11, 2019
- Dec 9, 2019 The Myth of a "Private Me" Dec 9, 2019
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November 2019
- Nov 26, 2019 Good Me, Bad Me, Not Me Nov 26, 2019
- Nov 17, 2019 Sustaining Adaptive Change Nov 17, 2019
- Nov 15, 2019 Formation of Self & Adaptive Change Nov 15, 2019
- Nov 14, 2019 Attention: Guiding Force of Freedom Nov 14, 2019
- Nov 8, 2019 Intentions & Acts: Vital Aspects of Change Nov 8, 2019
- Nov 4, 2019 What's Mental about "Mental" Models? Nov 4, 2019
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October 2019
- Oct 25, 2019 Coaching: A Brief 6-Week Model Oct 25, 2019
- Oct 23, 2019 How Love Solves Problems Oct 23, 2019
- Oct 11, 2019 On Being the Youngest Oct 11, 2019
- Oct 9, 2019 Procrastination and Self-Forgiveness Oct 9, 2019
- Oct 7, 2019 Cardinal Themes: Assertiveness and Honesty Oct 7, 2019
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September 2019
- Sep 22, 2019 Personal Impacts of Sociopolitical Chaos Sep 22, 2019
- Sep 19, 2019 Telling Lies and Telling Stories: Sep 19, 2019
- Sep 16, 2019 The Nature and Nurture of Kindness Sep 16, 2019
- Sep 7, 2019 Finding the Words Sep 7, 2019
- Sep 4, 2019 Helping One Another Through Conflict Sep 4, 2019
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August 2019
- Aug 28, 2019 A Powerful Interpersonal Model Aug 28, 2019
- Aug 27, 2019 Generative Dialogue Aug 27, 2019
- Aug 26, 2019 Coping with Conflict & Changing Habits Aug 26, 2019
- Aug 18, 2019 Practical Meditations for a Sabbath Day Aug 18, 2019
- Aug 15, 2019 Generating Positivity at Work Aug 15, 2019
- Aug 5, 2019 Career Coaching at Midlife Aug 5, 2019
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July 2019
- Jul 25, 2019 Trying Too Hard: A Control Issue Jul 25, 2019
- Jul 14, 2019 Supervision as Super∙Vision Jul 14, 2019
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June 2019
- Jun 28, 2019 Being Lonely and Being Alone Jun 28, 2019
- Jun 15, 2019 A Tale of Tears: Manager as Ethnographer Jun 15, 2019
- Jun 11, 2019 Assertiveness as Transparency Jun 11, 2019
- Jun 2, 2019 You Never Listen! Jun 2, 2019
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May 2019
- May 23, 2019 Executive Presence: A Short Course May 23, 2019
- May 21, 2019 Affection, Reflection, Responsibility May 21, 2019
- May 12, 2019 When We Get Frustrated May 12, 2019
- May 11, 2019 The Tethers We Choose May 11, 2019
- May 8, 2019 For Leaders: Emotions & Judgment May 8, 2019
- May 2, 2019 On the Fence About Coaching? May 2, 2019
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April 2019
- Apr 26, 2019 A Practice Idea: Notes to Clients Apr 26, 2019
- Apr 22, 2019 Relationships: Independence, Interdependence, & Intimacy Apr 22, 2019
- Apr 18, 2019 Trust: A Fragile Thing Apr 18, 2019
- Apr 16, 2019 Authenticity: More Than Individuality Apr 16, 2019
- Apr 12, 2019 Are You an Emerging Leader? Apr 12, 2019
- Apr 11, 2019 Making Difficult Personnel Decisions Apr 11, 2019
- Apr 8, 2019 3 Reasons to Care About Generativity Apr 8, 2019
- Apr 5, 2019 In Pursuit of Coaching Apr 5, 2019
- Apr 4, 2019 Adaptive Intelligence: 5 Tips Apr 4, 2019
- Apr 2, 2019 Leadership, Self-Interest, and Morality Apr 2, 2019
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March 2019
- Mar 31, 2019 Does Brief Coaching Work? Mar 31, 2019
- Mar 27, 2019 Coping with Infidelity in Professional Couples Mar 27, 2019
- Mar 12, 2019 Using 360 Feedback to Improve Mar 12, 2019
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February 2019
- Feb 22, 2019 Assessment as Stimulus Feb 22, 2019
- Feb 15, 2019 Is Your Boss in Your Way? Feb 15, 2019
- Feb 12, 2019 Psychotherapy or Coaching? Feb 12, 2019
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January 2019
- Jan 15, 2019 Confidence in Professional Couples Jan 15, 2019
- Jan 6, 2019 Getting Away and Coming Home Jan 6, 2019
- Jan 5, 2019 The Interpersonal Circumplex Jan 5, 2019
- Jan 2, 2019 Anger as Avoidance Jan 2, 2019
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December 2018
- Dec 26, 2018 On Trusting Your Gut Dec 26, 2018
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November 2018
- Nov 25, 2018 People, Planet, & Profit – The Triple Bottom Line Nov 25, 2018
- Nov 21, 2018 And How Is That Working For You? Nov 21, 2018
- Nov 20, 2018 Situation Analysis: Take Two Nov 20, 2018
- Nov 11, 2018 Mature Mind & Positive Influence Nov 11, 2018
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October 2018
- Oct 21, 2018 Are You Growing as a Leader? Oct 21, 2018
- Oct 14, 2018 Do You Really Want to Manage? Oct 14, 2018
- Oct 4, 2018 Fear as a Call to Action Oct 4, 2018
- Oct 3, 2018 Adaptive Development Oct 3, 2018
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September 2018
- Sep 23, 2018 On Destructive Leadership Sep 23, 2018
- Sep 19, 2018 Bridging Differences in Conversation Sep 19, 2018
- Sep 17, 2018 Sleep and Effectiveness Sep 17, 2018
- Sep 13, 2018 We Are Not Merely Homo Sapiens Sep 13, 2018
- Sep 11, 2018 Making and Keeping Commitments Sep 11, 2018
- Sep 8, 2018 Connecting Hard & Soft in Practice Sep 8, 2018
- Sep 6, 2018 Destiny Guided by a Calling Sep 6, 2018
- Sep 2, 2018 On Responsibility: John McCain & Henry Bugbee Sep 2, 2018
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August 2018
- Aug 29, 2018 Social Comparison & Ressentiment Aug 29, 2018
- Aug 19, 2018 Simple Tips to Boost Team Performance Aug 19, 2018
- Aug 17, 2018 Stress: Different for Professionals? Aug 17, 2018
- Aug 11, 2018 Restraint as Presence: How it Positions us to Lead Aug 11, 2018
- Aug 9, 2018 Stress, Strain & Burnout: What to do? Aug 9, 2018
- Aug 8, 2018 When We “Muscle Through” Aug 8, 2018
- Aug 5, 2018 A Coach's Motto: Measure Twice, Cut Once Aug 5, 2018
- Aug 1, 2018 Self Divided or Self Integrated? Your Choice Aug 1, 2018
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July 2018
- Jul 29, 2018 Does Gender Still Matter? How? Jul 29, 2018
- Jul 25, 2018 Internal Critics: How they're born and put to rest Jul 25, 2018
- Jul 24, 2018 Size of Self & Leadership Presence Jul 24, 2018
- Jul 21, 2018 A Classic Model of Team Development Jul 21, 2018
- Jul 16, 2018 When is Sponsorship Coercion? Jul 16, 2018
- Jul 12, 2018 "Boredom is a Lack of Attention" Jul 12, 2018
- Jul 6, 2018 Know the Person, Then Solve the Problem Jul 6, 2018
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June 2018
- Jun 29, 2018 A Rhythm of Connecting & Relating Jun 29, 2018
- Jun 21, 2018 Want Respect? First Respect Yourself Jun 21, 2018
- Jun 12, 2018 What is Customer/Client Centricity? Jun 12, 2018
- Jun 5, 2018 Helping Couples: Because Executives are People Too Jun 5, 2018
- Jun 3, 2018 Assess Your Efficacy on Three Critical Themes in Performance Jun 3, 2018
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May 2018
- May 23, 2018 Vital Relations: Couples and Colleagues May 23, 2018
- May 21, 2018 Rotations and Stretch Assignments May 21, 2018
- May 18, 2018 Not Needing vs. Not Knowing May 18, 2018
- May 14, 2018 Exhausted from trying too hard? May 14, 2018
- May 8, 2018 From Seeing to Doing May 8, 2018
- May 2, 2018 The Practice of Engagement May 2, 2018
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April 2018
- Apr 30, 2018 Competence & Care: A Powerful Pair Apr 30, 2018
- Apr 25, 2018 Time for a Change? Apr 25, 2018
- Apr 18, 2018 The Defensive Executive Apr 18, 2018
- Apr 16, 2018 Problem vs. Mystery: A Vital Difference Apr 16, 2018
- Apr 11, 2018 The Fulfilling Expression of Self Apr 11, 2018
- Apr 5, 2018 Welcoming the Hard Stuff Apr 5, 2018
- Apr 5, 2018 The Is and the Ought in Development Apr 5, 2018
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March 2018
- Mar 29, 2018 Five Principles of Practical Wisdom Mar 29, 2018
- Mar 27, 2018 Leadership Communication: Navigation & Meaning Mar 27, 2018
- Mar 21, 2018 A Leader's Role in Issues of Attitude Mar 21, 2018
- Mar 19, 2018 The Power of Stopping for Starting Mar 19, 2018
- Mar 15, 2018 When being quiet speaks volumes Mar 15, 2018
- Mar 9, 2018 Kindness as Skillful Leadership Action Mar 9, 2018
- Mar 7, 2018 Skillful Speech as Leadership Action Mar 7, 2018
- Mar 4, 2018 In Praise of Ordinary Virtue Mar 4, 2018
- Mar 3, 2018 Three Ways to Boost Proactivity Mar 3, 2018
- Mar 2, 2018 Skillful Action: Three Examples Mar 2, 2018
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February 2018
- Feb 26, 2018 Making Virtual Coaching Work Feb 26, 2018
- Feb 22, 2018 Getting Real About Performance & Development Feb 22, 2018
- Feb 21, 2018 Buddhist Psychology for Leaders Feb 21, 2018
- Feb 19, 2018 Coaching After Hours Feb 19, 2018
- Feb 16, 2018 On Being an "Imperfect" Buddhist Feb 16, 2018
- Feb 6, 2018 Moods, Attitudes, & Skillful Action Feb 6, 2018
- Feb 2, 2018 Virtual Coaching - It's Your Choice! Feb 2, 2018
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January 2018
- Jan 29, 2018 Executive Development & Action Learning Jan 29, 2018
- Jan 22, 2018 Development as Enlightened Pragmatism Jan 22, 2018
- Jan 17, 2018 Overcoming Bias: Appraisal of Talent Jan 17, 2018
- Jan 8, 2018 Self-Managing Your Personal Presence in the Boardroom Jan 8, 2018
- Jan 3, 2018 Making Relationships Work Jan 3, 2018
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December 2017
- Dec 29, 2017 Living the Moral Duty of Leadership Dec 29, 2017
- Dec 15, 2017 Safety & Confidence: Leaders Need Both Dec 15, 2017
- Dec 14, 2017 What Makes Active Listening Work? Dec 14, 2017
- Dec 12, 2017 Why Counting to 10 Works Dec 12, 2017
- Dec 4, 2017 Person as Bridge to the Manager-Leader Divide Dec 4, 2017
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November 2017
- Nov 27, 2017 Finding & Following the Leading Thread Nov 27, 2017
- Nov 16, 2017 Fear, Self, and Thriving Nov 16, 2017
- Nov 12, 2017 What is Your Vitalizing Practice? Nov 12, 2017
- Nov 7, 2017 Right Speech & Good Leadership Nov 7, 2017
- Nov 1, 2017 Presence and Personal Efficacy Nov 1, 2017
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October 2017
- Oct 16, 2017 Full-Minded Leadership Presence Oct 16, 2017
- Oct 12, 2017 The Responsibility Discussion in Teams Oct 12, 2017
- Oct 12, 2017 Tapping all the potential of your talent pool Oct 12, 2017
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September 2017
- Sep 21, 2017 The Social Sources of Self Sep 21, 2017
- Sep 8, 2017 Getting Smart About Stress Sep 8, 2017
- Sep 1, 2017 The Tuckman Model of Team Development Sep 1, 2017
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August 2017
- Aug 28, 2017 Lower Agreeableness = More Stress Aug 28, 2017
- Aug 25, 2017 Pay it forward coaching Aug 25, 2017
- Aug 23, 2017 Work-Related Stress and You Aug 23, 2017
- Aug 11, 2017 Another Use for Mindfulness at Google Aug 11, 2017
- Aug 6, 2017 Smiling Back at Our Problems Aug 6, 2017
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July 2017
- Jul 13, 2017 Frustration, Waste, & Personal Performance Jul 13, 2017
- Jul 10, 2017 The 4 T's of Great Relationships Jul 10, 2017
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June 2017
- Jun 19, 2017 Two Selves, Together and Apart: Practical Consequences Jun 19, 2017
- Jun 8, 2017 On Willing Avoidance Jun 8, 2017
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May 2017
- May 23, 2017 Behavioral Integrity and Culture Change May 23, 2017
- May 22, 2017 Why we struggle with conflict May 22, 2017
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April 2017
- Apr 26, 2017 Leadership as Idenity Work Apr 26, 2017
- Apr 23, 2017 3 Habits for Bolstering Engagement Apr 23, 2017
- Apr 12, 2017 Encouraging Emergent Leadership Apr 12, 2017
- Apr 12, 2017 Can there really be too much IQ? Apr 12, 2017
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March 2017
- Mar 13, 2017 The Gathering Influence of Presence Mar 13, 2017
- Mar 10, 2017 3 Things People Want from Coaching Mar 10, 2017
- Mar 8, 2017 The March for Science: A Call for Reasonableness? Mar 8, 2017
- Mar 6, 2017 Poetry & the Meaning of Emotions Mar 6, 2017
- Mar 3, 2017 Leaders Helping Others Cope with Time Pressures Mar 3, 2017
- Mar 1, 2017 How We Use Our Minds at Work: It Changes Mar 1, 2017
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February 2017
- Feb 14, 2017 Empathy, Engagement, and Leadership Feb 14, 2017
- Feb 2, 2017 Agency: The Vital Center of Leader Action Feb 2, 2017
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January 2017
- Jan 30, 2017 Leader Identity Development Jan 30, 2017
- Jan 16, 2017 HRD as Action Research Jan 16, 2017
- Jan 11, 2017 Encouraging Emergent Leadership Jan 11, 2017
- Jan 9, 2017 4 Reasons to Approach Leader Development as Identity Work Jan 9, 2017
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December 2016
- Dec 21, 2016 Why is Mindfulness so Popular? Dec 21, 2016
- Dec 19, 2016 3 Keys to Enduring Emotional Positivity Dec 19, 2016
- Dec 16, 2016 Moral Philosophy for Leaders: A Webinar Dec 16, 2016
- Dec 12, 2016 Making Emerging Leader Development Work Dec 12, 2016
- Dec 12, 2016 Action Learning and Leader Emergence Dec 12, 2016
- Dec 12, 2016 Four Features of Moral Motivation in Leadership Dec 12, 2016
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November 2016
- Nov 23, 2016 The Reflective Function Nov 23, 2016
- Nov 20, 2016 Agency: a vital aspect of leader identity development Nov 20, 2016
- Nov 17, 2016 Emerging Leader Development Webinar Nov 17, 2016
- Nov 11, 2016 Making Something of Yourself as a Leader Nov 11, 2016
- Nov 3, 2016 Moral versus Moralistic: A vital difference and a role for leaders Nov 3, 2016
- Nov 1, 2016 Leaders' Fidelity to What, to Whom? Nov 1, 2016
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October 2016
- Oct 29, 2016 Security and Leadership: A Quality Worth Cultivating Oct 29, 2016
- Oct 13, 2016 Good Pride and Bad Pride Oct 13, 2016
- Oct 2, 2016 Three Keys to Organizational Sustainability: Vital Structure, Agency, and Relational Dynamics Oct 2, 2016
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September 2016
- Sep 19, 2016 Leadership, Leader Development, and the Future of Humankind Sep 19, 2016
- Sep 6, 2016 What Leaders Can Learn From a 3-Year-Old Sep 6, 2016
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August 2016
- Aug 16, 2016 Contingency and Leader Action Aug 16, 2016
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July 2016
- Jul 11, 2016 The Paradoxical Effect of Enlightened Self-Reliance Jul 11, 2016
- Jul 2, 2016 Wanted: Courageous Clients Jul 2, 2016
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June 2016
- Jun 29, 2016 Something Old, Something New: The Johari Window in Relational Coaching Jun 29, 2016
- Jun 22, 2016 The Accidental Struggle Against Happiness Jun 22, 2016
- Jun 18, 2016 Personal Development as Narrowing and as Broadening Jun 18, 2016
- Jun 10, 2016 Founder's Syndrome: Its Impact and Resolution Jun 10, 2016
- Jun 8, 2016 Leadership: Security, Confidence, and Resilience Jun 8, 2016
- Jun 3, 2016 Making Change: Structure, Choices, and Doing Jun 3, 2016
- Jun 2, 2016 Development and Relational Scaffolding Jun 2, 2016
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May 2016
- May 31, 2016 Leader Identity and Communicative Action May 31, 2016
- May 19, 2016 Getting to the Impact of D & I: What Makes Us Who We Are? May 19, 2016
- May 3, 2016 The Achilles Heel of Development May 3, 2016
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April 2016
- Apr 13, 2016 When Leaders Make Faces Apr 13, 2016
- Apr 8, 2016 Claiming and Granting Leadership: How It Works Apr 8, 2016
- Apr 5, 2016 Executive Development: Coaching or Therapy? Apr 5, 2016
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March 2016
- Mar 30, 2016 Living and Leading from a Secure Base Mar 30, 2016
- Mar 23, 2016 Generativity—Its Role in Promoting Leader Development Mar 23, 2016
- Mar 23, 2016 Diversity, Inclusion, and Leader Emergence: What White Males Can Do Mar 23, 2016
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February 2016
- Feb 29, 2016 Generativity: Why Care? Feb 29, 2016
- Feb 19, 2016 Leadership Presence and Relational Knowing Feb 19, 2016
- Feb 9, 2016 Smart Money Says Promote from Within Feb 9, 2016
- Feb 4, 2016 Creating the Capacity for Teamwork in Real Time Feb 4, 2016
- Feb 3, 2016 Creating Space for Adaptive Action Feb 3, 2016
- Feb 2, 2016 Assessment as Vital Engagement Feb 2, 2016
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January 2016
- Jan 21, 2016 Connecting the Dots: Fairness, Engagement & Emergent Leadership Jan 21, 2016
- Jan 16, 2016 Practical Ways to Advance Your Leadership in 2016 Jan 16, 2016
- Jan 8, 2016 Why We Expect Arrogance in Leaders Jan 8, 2016
- Jan 4, 2016 The Power of Emergent Leadership Jan 4, 2016
- Jan 1, 2016 Honing Team Dynamics at Home Jan 1, 2016
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December 2015
- Dec 30, 2015 The Einstein Emotions Dec 30, 2015
- Dec 16, 2015 Onboarding as Performance Management Dec 16, 2015
- Dec 10, 2015 3-Step Solution to Opportunistic Hiring Dec 10, 2015
- Dec 9, 2015 Engagement, Fairness, and Care Dec 9, 2015
- Dec 4, 2015 Real Authenticity & Leadership Dec 4, 2015
- Dec 1, 2015 The Potential to Lead - Part 2 of 3 Dec 1, 2015
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November 2015
- Nov 30, 2015 A Meditation on Effective Action Nov 30, 2015
- Nov 25, 2015 The Potential to Lead - Part 1 of 3 Nov 25, 2015
- Nov 22, 2015 The Ceiling Effects of IQ in Selection Nov 22, 2015
- Nov 16, 2015 Executive Selection: Getting It Right Nov 16, 2015